Things I have learned since having boys

I am an only child. I had all girl cousins until I was in 5th grade, and even after the boys were born, I didn’t hang out with them all that much. I knew very little about what little boys did until I had my own. I still don’t understand how they work, but I have learned a lot in the last 11 years. The following is just the tip of the iceberg, really:

  • Apparently there are “brands” of super heroes
  • Not all construction vehicles are called bulldozers
  • Not everyone hits the toilet 100% of the time
  • Showers are optional, especially when needed the most
  • It is possible to play with action figures (boy speak for dolls) and not dress them up, braid their hair and put jewelry on them
  • Jewels is a very funny word
  • So is poop
  • You can make a toy gun out of almost anything – including a breakfast bar
  • Having a penis inhibits one from hearing  people speak when the TV is on
  • Joy can be found in breaking brand new Crayons (I still have a hard time with this one….I’m not going to lie)
  • A hammock is not just a place to rest; it is a pirate ship
  • Toothpaste can end up anywhere and everywhere
  • Boba Fett is really, really popular
  • Dressing up is one of the most terrible things ever
  • Newborns can have stinky feet
  • Not everyone thinks The Sound of Music is a masterpiece

Again, I could go on forever, because these little people have made me better. They have shown me things I never would have seen before having them. I love watching their reactions to hilarious words like “toot” and “poopybutt”.  It amazes me even more that I enjoy playing war with them and shooting guns made out of crackers randomly at the dinner table. Boys are way more than just sweaty little noise makers. They are valiant defenders of the universe, exhausting their parents one day at a time.10171672_10202597015143191_2010368376_n

 

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