It’s me. I read the last page of a book first. I read the spoilers on IMDB.com. I even stop watching Gone with the Wind at the “no more babies” scene. I don’t watch movies to be scared, sad or grossed out. I watch movies to see beautiful people living a ridiculously not-real life, preferably while they are making me laugh.
I do not wish to waste my valuable time reading a book that is going to kill off the heroine in the last chapter. I don’t want to sit through a television show in which there are going to be children in harm’s way. I have absolutely no desire to see a movie that is going to end like Cast Away, where you never find out what was in the stinking package OR whether he gets a date with the woman in the country.
In real life you cannot see the future, nor do any of us really want to. In entertainment world there is an element of control. You can keep yourself from being scared of the wrong bad guy. You don’t have to cry when Wilson floats away. You can know that Scarlett gets her plantation back, Bonnie dies and Rhett bids adieu. You can just google it, sit back and watch everyone else as they suddenly get “allergies” that make their eyes all watery.
I am not adverse to surprises. I love a good surprise birthday party. How about a present because it’s just been too long since my birthday? You can see my thoughts on that here: http://ricnrin.com/?p=185. And one of the best surprises ever: “pack your bags because we are going on a trip today”. I love those fun unknowns. There are enough stressful situations in life of which we have no clue how they will end. Why would we let that uncertainty extend into our world of reading? I just want to know at the beginning of a new Mary Higgins Clark book that everything works out for the poor girl that has been targeted by a psycho killer; or that my “allergies” won’t suddenly go into overdrive during an episode of Criminal Minds. I feel like this makes me a more responsible citizen. Isn’t is the Boy Scouts that say “always be prepared”? That’s what I am doing, just listening to the wise words of little men.